Tuesday, August 07, 2007

Elton John

Elton John (am I breaking the law if I don't call him "Sir"?) wants to shut down the Internet, to save the quality of new music being made.

You gotta hand it to him, it takes balls to be such a luddite (his words) in 2007. Ten years ago every third newspaper reporter was saying that the Net was a fad or crap. But I think by now most people have realized that the Internet is quite simple global communication, instant and practically free. And that to call that a bad thing is just boneheaded.

TTL intones:
Elton John is right, but his suggested action to shut down the Internet is not enough.

I say all music should be live. And to ensure this we need to shutdown all international freight and logistics services. For these have for 60 years been used to ship music on dead formats such as vinyl records and CDs. These formats and distribution methods have provided a breeding ground for vulgar pop music such as that produced by Elton John. We need to rid our societies of this mechanically produced noise as soon as possible.

The only acceptable forms of music are opera, orchestral, choir and chamber music. And the only acceptable medium to enjoy them is live attendance.

I trust that we all want to take care of this matter in the earnest. For unless we do so the future of humankind is most certainly doomed.

Quite right. And it's almost too late, so we better start now. Does anybody volunteer to coordinate the efforts?

22 comments:

Anonymous said...

Now, I have concluded on how Elton Johnis like, he is ignorant, conservative, homosexual, and talented. I liked to listened to some of his songs. I personally, didn't like him afterward because he was a gay and now more because he is promoting backwardness.

Anonymous said...

Same goes with phones, those new-fangled horseless buggies, and such. It's just fad that will pass. ;o)

Cliff Prince said...

Well, as the resident Luddite on the board, I have to chime in. No, the internet is indeed here to stay. I used to worry that it requires reliable power supplies -- electricity being something that is not readily stock-pile-able or even hoard-able -- but then I figured out that an average laptop, and an average router, and an average server, could all pretty easily operate all day off of a single newfangled solar panel, so I got a lot less worried about it.

Hey, come to think of it, wouldn't a laptop solar panel be a great idea. Hmm.

I do agree that there are some minor problems that have come from the propagation of new media. The biggest of them seems to be the internal combustion of the news media. That which was once a (supposedly) expert-edited, and therefore marginally trustworthy (if somewhat slow) medium, has become so entangled with the info-tainment and web-content "streaming" businesses that there's really no way to distinguish good news reporting from bad any more.

It used to be that you could trust the fact, that someone who had thought long and hard about how to put something, had some vested interest in (and skill at) presenting that something as objectively as possible. And even that he knew what the word "objective" meant, knew it was unlikely to be easily attained if at all, and knew it was an ideal to strive toward. We've given up on all that. Now we just assume that CNN is moderate-to-near-right, FOX is idiotically far-right, the BBC is hand-in-glove with al Qaeda, and al Jazeera in English is fiction. :P

So that's the down-side of the internet. But global communication, I think, can do nothing but improve understanding, over the long run. All those unfortunate people whose societies are trapped near the stone age now realize that technologies in medicine, physics, education all exist and might benefit them, and all they have to do is bomb the nearest Western hotel or embassy to get them! Oh no, wait, that's another big down side to the internet.

So wait, there's got to be a good side. Hang on a bit, I'll figure it out.

Oh yeah, I remember now. All that porn. Heck, I wouldn't have had any idea what my girlfriend was SUPPOSED to look like, except that I got a chance to see Pam Anderson's beautiful all-natural perfectly proportioned body on the internet. Now I'm totally dissatisfied with my girlfriend because she doesn't even look as good as a DOMAI model, much less as good as Pam Anderson! Oh, that's not good either, that's bad, hang on ...

:)

I'm kidding, of course. I do value the growth of world-wide "awareness" that the internet provides. I think it is mostly a good thing. And I think Mr. John John's plan for shutting down the internet may seem hare-brained, but it probably isn't as far-fetched as we might initially think. I'll bet there are US Defense Department scenarios for shutting it down for long periods at a stretch for "national security" purposes, and effecting that not just in the USA but world-wide. I'll bet Time-Warner and other entertainment conglomerates spend a lot of their research and development time on beating adolescent males at the game of stealing nickels and dimes worth of music by "shutting down" free information exchange. Is Johnny really so far away from those examples?

Anonymous said...

"I personally, didn't like him afterward because he was a gay and now more because he is promoting backwardness."

Lol, I hope I'm not the only person that got the irony of that sentence.

Elton's got the wrong idea. It's not the internet that's causing problems with today's music, it's a simple lack of creativity. Instead of exploring new musical territories, people seem to be content with playing the same two or three songs over and over and over and over again. On top of that, rock musicians(and fans too) are scared to death of being perceived as sell-outs or posers, so they go out of their way to make their music as inaccesible as possible. Having a good melody in your song is a crime punishable by death these days(or at least punishable by having bottles of piss thrown at you), so what we're left with are a bunch of dime-a-dozen metal bands banging on their instruments and making barking noises.

Sorry, music's something I'm passionate about. :)

Any ill effects the internet might have on music are far outweighed by the good. The internet helps musicians find each other, helps share their music, and helps newer bands get discovered. I don't think anyone's going to starve to death over a few downloads.

Cliff Prince said...

Heck yeah. And OLGA zip files are still out there somewhere ... :) ...

Paul Sunstone said...

The internet has allowed me to meet online people I would not otherwise have even a remote chance of meeting, to interact with them, to learn from them, and to be inspired by them. If that's a bad thing, then bring it on anyway!

Anonymous said...

I am the GREATIST ELTON JOHN FAN EVER, but feel he is in error over this. And people who don't like him simply because he is gay are prejudice and are not worth the time of day. (Though I believe homosexuality is a sin) His music legendary hits, (Too many to number and name) for over 35 years will always DOMINATE the Globe.
He couldn't be broke if he tried.
He has a right to voice his opinion even if some disagree with him.

Sorry, music's something I'm passionate about. :)

Jess, and I'm EXTREMELY passionate with his endeavoring creativity. For me, Elton John is and will always be the true "King of Music."
Forever. Love his music, not his lifestyle. Hats off too to Bernie Taupin, the brown dirt cowboy!

Anonymous said...

Elton John is right, but his suggested action to shut down the Internet is not enough.

I say all music should be live. And to ensure this we need to shutdown all international freight and logistics services. For these have for 60 years been used to ship music on dead formats such as vinyl records and CDs. These formats and distribution methods have provided a breeding ground for vulgar pop music such as that produced by Elton John. We need to rid our societies of this mechanically produced noise as soon as possible.

The only acceptable forms of music are opera, orchestral, choir and chamber music. And the only acceptable medium to enjoy them is live attendance.

I trust that we all want to take care of this matter in the earnest. For unless we do so the future of human kind is most certainly doomed.

Alex said...

TTL - There is a fun, whimsical discourse on the validity of recording in "Diva", a short novel by Delacorta (aka Daniel Odier).

I believe your post was not entirely in earnest but...

I think Choral music is very disturbing. If you ever take the time to listen to Pink Floyds "Atom Heart Mother" or Alan Parsons "I Robot", Philip Glass, Michael Nyman, or Liegeti you will know that choral is a dark force. It is pervasive and challenging. This sometimes does not feel like music, but like a mournful sub-existence trying to fill your soul.

Now if you take Beethoven, Souza or Strauss, what do you have? Some of the most airy light pop music you could imagine.

Now, live versus recorded medium. I very much enjoyed seeing Dr Atomic, the whirling motion, the damatic presentation of the minutes and diaries, and the harrowing detonation, and subsequent demolition of Hiroshima. At times Adams subjected to choral movements, here it was absolutely fitting, ready to disquiet us. Every times Adams stretched in a new direction, and his piece achieved a fresh vitality, he shied away to more tried and trusted avenues.

That said, I got more from a $100 performance than I would have gotten from a $15 CD, however, I would get more out of 10 $10 CDs.

How live is live music? How good is it? I saw a stellar concert by Tangerine Dream, the music was performed live, but the sax, a difficult instrument to amplify, was too distorted. It had to be amped to cope with the rest of the instruments. Before you say the arena has a lot to do with acoustics, this was in the opera house in Nottingham.

Another band I saw live was "The Orb". They are termed "electronica" but they are avant garde composers. The band were burried behind their equipment, and the music could have been entirely pre-sequenced. Was this a live performance? Who can say.

Another great performer I have not see on stage yet is Laurie Anderson. As a performance artist you'd think seeing her live would be paramount. Her music is extremely creative, but her stories are the important factor. Each piece of poetry of prose is carefully delivered. Sure, seeing her live would be good, but dissemination of her literature is the important part. Without CD's I'd miss out on many one time performances.

Maybe we should all go to the theater instead of the cinema. Maybe we should all go to readings and not have books.

An excellent performance is always flattened by capturing into a specific medium, be it print, screen or sound. But an excellent performance that is captured can be shared by many, and gives us all something to aspire to.

Access to live music is very limited, once in a while you'll come across a ceilidh band in a pub, or there be a band in the park. Seldom do you stroll down the high street and come across an opera singer busking, though sometimes you see a string quartet.

To everyone else I say Elton John was excellent in the Bob The Builder movie (Bobs Christmas).

Anonymous said...

Terry - I'm ashamed to say Elton John isn't an artist I've gotten into yet, but I've been meaning to. What's a good place to start? Seems like I've heard No More Yellow Brick Road is good.

TTL - Oh man, for like half a second I thought you were being serious. Don't get me wrong, I love live music as much as the next guy(seeing Black Sabbath at Ozzfest in 2004 was one of the best days of my life), but the day someone tells me I have to give up my 400+ CDs is the day I put on my ass-kicking boots.

Eolake Stobblehouse said...

I like Elton's album "Too Low For Zero".

Anonymous said...

It's a bad thing for record companies that have been fucking us up the ass for decades and are now realizing that sweet ride is over.

Anonymous said...

anurag, learn English please. You sound like you're on crack.

Eolake Stobblehouse said...

Many readers/commentators here do not have English as their first language. Just as I don't myself, actually.

Anonymous said...

Well, I wanted to say it as follows:

Now, I have concluded on what Elton John is like. He is ignorant, conservative, a homosexual, and quite talented. I like to listen to most of his songs, however, I don't like him as a person since he is a gay and now he is supporting backwardness.

Now, how was it?

Anonymous said...

I don't like him as a person since he is a gay and now he is supporting backwardness.

Now, how was it?

Jealousy is plain here. Elton's been laughing all the way to the bank since 1970 with Your Song.
The man is a living legend. I adore his music.

Jess, Goodbye Yellow Brick Road was a multi-selling Planinum Album along with Captain Fantastic. Elton ALSO won a huge Trophy for the Lion King's soundtrack.
The albums, THE BIG PICTURE, SONGS FROM THE WEST COAST,MADE IN ENGLAND and SLEEPING WITH THE PAST are excellent!
The man NEVER ceases to amaze me with his GENIUNE TALENT. His brand new CD THE CAPTAIN AND THE KID are reminiscent of his older mega hits.
But please give these albums a try.

And Eolake, Too Low for Zero is great, I agree. Oh yeah, LIVE IN AUSTRAIA is extremely moving.....I tip my hat to the master of tunes Sir Elton!

Anonymous said...

ttl said:
I say all music should be live. ...The only acceptable forms of music are opera, orchestral, choir and chamber music.

Hopefully that was joke post. I'd hate to be deprived of the masterful playing of Glenn Gould because recorded music was outlawed. Ever read Flowers for Algernon? You can't go back.

Anonymous said...

Satire is a difficult genre, I note. No, I don't really want to shut down all international freight and logistics services. It makes as little sense as shutting down the Internet just because it is possible to distribute mediocre music over it.

I will cap my pen now, and go listen to some Elton John.

Anonymous said...

Satire is a difficult genre, I note.

True. It's especially difficult to carry off over the internet. I'm sure we've all found that it's difficult sometimes to tell when someone's joking when all we've got is text.

Anonymous said...

Satire is a difficult genre, I note.

Is that what you were trying to do?! Holy shit, but that was a pretty sad effort. I'd suggest capping that pen permanently.

Eolake Stobblehouse said...

Anon, please be civil, and put in your name on posts.

Anonymous said...

Don't worry, Final, they'll never shut down the internet, it's all big tuff talk. The economy now relies so heavily on it, that there's just too much money to lose for the big companies. Munny rulz, knowhatimsayin'? Da man needs da cash, he's addicted to white people's bling. All that jibber-jabber's just a load of (golden) bull.